Distractions

He stares right back.

“The wildlife is profoundly distracting,” said Eleanor to Chauncey, who was frying bacon in the kitchen.  Eleanor had been sitting outside at the table drawing roses in a vase.  “There is this squirrel who is messing with me on purpose.  He keeps climbing up on the fence behind me.  I tell myself to have faith that he would never just leap onto my shoulder.  But, then, I get up and yell at him to go away.  He leaps onto a branch and looks like he is going to honor my request only to jump onto the ground right behind the fence so I can still hear him wandering around on the dead leaves.  Before I know it, he is back up on the fence.  So I get up and stare at him in the eyes and he stares right back.  He has enormous balls.” Chauncey nods knowingly having spent his share of time studying squirrels and other creatures of the backyard.